Monthly Archives: January 2013

Have you ever tried to push a rope?

Doesn’t work very well does it?

Have you ever: Felt like you were being pushed around?  Used against your will or best interests?  Pushed by a less than professional sales person?  What did you do? Most of us will dig in our heels and resist or we will comply and be miserable until we find a way out of the situation.

On the other hand, have you ever been positively influenced to change positions, invest in a purchase or take on a task?

One feels like being mugged and the other can be a rewarding experience.

Rule number 2 from John Maxwell’s book The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership is says that Leadership is Influence. Nothing more and nothing less.

Nobody wants to be ordered, but everyone wants to be led. Employees want to feel that their effort make a difference in not only their lives, but in the lives of others. 

Everyone likes to buy things, but nobody wants to be sold.  Customers always want to feel that they have purchased a great product at a fair price; they do not want to feel like they have been tricked or pushed into something.

Your children don’t want you to tell them what to do, but…… when you ask them deep down they want to have parents that look out for them, set expectation and help them reach their full potential.

Whether you are a manager, sales professional, parent or a peer, influence is much less work and much more effective in the long run than command and control; however, you will have to invest time and effort to learn the skills.

If you would like to know more about how you can have me lead your team through John’s book The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, please contact me.


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My favorite Martin Luther King JR Quotes

If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and Earth will pause to say, Here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well.

“Everybody can be great, because everybody can serve. You don’t have to have a college degree to serve. You don’t have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve. You don’t have to know about Plato and Aristotle to serve. You don’t have to know Einstein’s theory of relativity to serve. You don’t have to know the second theory of thermodynamics in physics to serve. You only need a heart full of grace, a soul generated by love.”

The first question which the priest and the Levite asked was: “If I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?” But… the good Samaritan reversed the question: “If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?”

We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.

The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.


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Filed under Achievement, enthusiasm, Leadership, life, passion, success

Brutally Honest is a Contradiction in Terms


Bob Burg posted the following on Facebook today. “Those who take pride in being “brutally honest” are typically more interested in being brutal than they are in being honest. “

It resonated with me as it has many others, so I cruised on over to his blog and found the article Self Editing is a Beautiful Thing. (Please check it out.)

Reading it instantly reminded me of the folks with whom I have crossed paths in my life who share this pride in their brutality.  (Like I wanted to be reminded of them. Thanks Bob) ‘

Anyway,all joking aside as I was thinking about these “special” people in my life it dawned on me that brutal honesty was a contradiction in terms.

A quick check on “The Google” and I found these definitions.

  • Brutal – Savage; cruel; inhumane, crude; coarse Synonyms – ferocious, brutish,  barbarous cruel
  • Honest – Upright and fair. Sincere, Freedom from  deceit or fraud. Synonyms – integrity, probity, rectitude

As you can see, you can be honest and you can be brutal, but you cannot be both at the same time.  A person who takes “pride in their bluntness is either proving that they are immature or proving that they are too lazy to learn to communicate with some tact and diplomacy.

As my friend and mentor, John Maxwell says. “Sometime wisdom comes with age. Sometimes the age comes alone.”

 I would love to hear your comment on this week’s post.

 Phil is one of only one thousand leaders worldwide (representing nearly 100 countries) to be trained and certified by John C. Maxwell & his team, as part of the founder’s circle of coaches, speakers and teachers.


Filed under Leadership